Soup Herman

I love natural soup.

Soup comes in many forms, and many flavours, and has many textures, colours and spices. You have your chunky soup, and then there’s the watery soup. The soup with lentils, and the soup that remains lentil free. 

But the best soup of all, perhaps the only true soup: natural soup. 

I drink soup every single day on my way to and from work. It’s from a mug, you see (if it was with a spoon, I’d be eating soup). The nourishing brain power of the natural soup was what gave me the power to come up with the best car park design plan in all of the world, which finally ended the parking crisis of 2013 and made me a superstar!

That was the fantasy I had while drinking natural soup. Someone probably did solve the great car park design crisis of 2013, because it used to be very difficult to park, but now it’s easier. It’s even more difficult to park when you’re trying to drink soup, which does happen sometimes. I suppose I would have had the power to solve the car park design crisis, if I chose to divert the power of natural soup to my brain. However, I used it to fuel a vivid fantasy instead, one in which I was a traffic management consultant and my innovation saved the day. I then went on to become the Minister for Soup, creating a National Soup Appreciation Day and making soup thrice weekly a mandatory meal plan for the whole country. Oh, and I did away with all soups that weren’t natural (or ‘poison’, as I call them). It was a true soup coup.

Unrelated to the traffic management, though. I will admit, it was the backbone of the fantasy. In real life, I suppose I could never be a traffic engineer consultant. Melbourne isn’t ready for my special, soup-related traffic assessment. But it would be all natural, so…that’s their loss.

-Herman